Caught in Nighttime
by pyrethrum
Summary: After the death of Mona, Hanna has finally reached a breaking point, and it's up to Spencer and the others to fix her. But how will Spencer's inner feelings and outside forces- for example, A- affect Hanna's state?
1. Chapter 1

Spencer shot up to the sound of sobbing. She sighed and turned to Hanna, who mirrored Spencer's position with the exception of glistening tears poking their way through the darkness of the bedroom. Spencer stretched and got out of "bed"- which was actually just the windowsill of Hanna's room stocked with pillows and two blankets- and sat next to Hanna, instantly wrapping her arms around Hanna's quivering body.

"It's okay. It's okay," Spencer whispered. She could hear whimpers from her friend slipping out uncontrollably. Hanna had held in so much trauma. Getting hit by a car, experiencing assumed near-death on a tiny boat out on the river with Lucas, watching the bloodied body of her boyfriend get shoved into the back of an ambulance, and finally the death of Mona, with so much more intertwined throughout. Hanna had talked feverishly about her fuming dislike toward Mona, for good reason, up until Mona had begun helping them out. It had almost seemed as if Hanna was forgiving Mona and excitedly awaiting the return of Mona into her life to be the old friends that they once were. Still, Spencer didn't expect this would be the breaking point. Spencer didn't expect Hanna to break. Like Spencer, Hanna had often repressed her feelings to be expressed in solitude- this was something the pair shared. But Hanna had broken. Spencer looked at Hanna for just a moment. Even in the dimness of the night, Hanna's messy blonde curls draped across her salt-stricken face. Spencer draped her fingers around Hanna's hair, gently guiding it behind her friend's ear. Hanna's arms were hot and Spencer could make out red cheeks on her face to match; whether this was from the crying or embarrassment, Spencer would never ask. Spencer looked down at her own bony hands, clasped together around Hanna's hunched body. It was the second time Hanna had woken up that night. It was a nightly procedure- while Hanna tried her best to persuade the world she was fine as soon as the sun was up, it was the late hours of midnight and on that took her away into nightmares and sadness. Spencer let Hanna breathe a moment, then: "Han, what did you dream about?"

Hanna attempted to subdue her crying.

"It was… I was with Caleb," Hanna started. Caleb had been Hanna's watchdog the previous night- Spencer, Caleb, Emily, and Aria took turns, but Caleb by far had spent the greatest number of nights. Hanna's mother Ashley had been gone on a business trip for so long now, it seemed as if her boyfriend was doubling as caretaker.

"We were at the lake house and it was dark, and then I couldn't find him, and then someone came up behind me and grabbed me…"

Hanna's voice shook and trailed off and she dove into her lap and she returned to her weeping state.

"This can't go on, Hanna," she whispered as she rubbed Hanna's back. "You can't keep living like this."

Hanna didn't reply, her head remaining buried in her blanket-protected thighs. Spencer sighed and continued softly brushing her hand along Hanna's spine. Since Mona's death, Ali had avoided them all like the plague… or at least, she'd made it seem as much. Spencer wondered if Ali knew anything of the state Hanna was in. She hoped desperately that Ali knew nothing- Ali prayed on weakness. When they were all younger, Hanna was always the weakest. She was the fattest and the shyest and Ali had no trouble pointing it out at every opportunity. Now Hanna was the weakest again. Spencer wouldn't let Ali get near Hanna like this. Unlike Ali, Spencer and the others had heard from A, Hanna especially. A knew Hanna was struggling deeply. The texts of mockery had only made Hanna's condition worse, therefore every night, whoever was Hanna's guardian for the night was in charge of keeping the phone far away.

"I know you're hurting," Spencer whispered down to Hanna's hidden face. "I'm so sorry you are and I wish I could understand how you're feeling right now. Seeing you like this is…"

Spencer stopped herself, worrying she was about to come off too condescending. Hanna was naïve and could, at times, be a bit slow to catch up with her friends, she was not dumb.

"I wish I could understand how you're feeling. We've tried to talk to you about talking to someone…"

Spencer had avoided the words "professional" and "therapist" at all costs.

"…But you won't go. You need to talk to someone."

Hanna didn't respond.

"And if you won't talk to a stranger… maybe… maybe you can talk to me."

Hanna's crying had softened.

"Hanna, this is no way for you to live. Please… I don't want you to keep feeling this way."

Then, Hanna sat up. She turned and met Spencer's gaze, her sky-blue eyes sparkling and reddened and tired. Spencer let a small smile curl out between her lips.

"You can talk to me."

Spencer felt Hanna's voice treading between tones as she forced out words.

"I never feel good anymore," she uttered. "I feel just as bad in the day as I do right now. I haven't stopped feeling bad since Mona died."

Spencer replied after giving Hanna a few extra seconds, just in case she'd decided to say more.

"Sometimes I can tell," Spencer said, "in the daytime. The way you look at things. It's different than how you used to."

"I think about doing bad things to myself a lot."

Spencer tried not to let her shock arise out of her mind and onto her facial expression in response to Hanna. Spencer never thought Hanna would be someone to consider harming herself.

"When I'm alone, especially."

"But you're never alone, Hanna. We're always with you… somebody's always with you."

Hanna wiped at her eyes as bits of hair fell back in front of her face.

"Sometimes when I'm showering or before I fall asleep and… and one of you already fell asleep-"

Spencer wondered what Hanna thought of her constant stream of friend-bodyguards.

"-I think about things I could hurt myself with. Sometimes… I…"

Hanna was beginning to become choked up again. "A lot of the time, I feel like I should be dead. A lot of times, I want to kill myself."

In that moment, Spencer felt a tear of empathy roll down her own cheek. "Han, no, no, no, no…"

Tears were now flowing down Hanna's face again, however, she was now silent through her shaky sorrow. Spencer felt her body cloak around Hanna once more, as if hugging her would protect her from every demon that'd been shot into her brain. Spencer felt Hanna's own arms hug back as a damp-cheeked messy-haired head rested upon Spencer's chest.

"Please don't kill yourself, Han, please, please," Spencer whispered then, tears now flooding down her face, "I love you so, so much… please, we all love you so much. You need to get real help… please…"

Hanna was barely audible now. "I love you, too."

Hanna fell back into gasping sobs. Spencer set her down on her side and laid down next to her, draping the covers over Hanna's shoulders. Hanna settled eventually, Spencer remaining by her side, awake in protection of Hanna over herself. After a long while, Hanna's hushed weeps faded away into slumber. Spencer sat up in the bed, thinking up riddles in her mind to keep her up. If Hanna woke up again- which she probably would- Spencer would be right there with her. Hanna was going to get through this. Spencer was going to make sure of it. Not even an hour later, Spencer felt the rush of Hanna's awakening; a shrill scream followed by bawling. Spencer immediately hugged Hanna as she sat up. Hanna coughed out sadness from the darkness. Beneath wails of grief stuck to Hanna, Spencer spoke quietly. "It's okay," she promised, "You're going to be okay. We'll get through this, Han. I love you. I love you."


	2. Chapter 2

"She needs to see a therapist."

Spencer eyed her friends' reactions. Aria seemed to stare through her while Emily's gaze focused downward. Spencer wished that Caleb could be part of the meeting, but, as it often occurred, he was the first to volunteer to stay with Hanna when Spencer said that there needed to be a group discussion without her. Spencer waited for a response. Finally, Emily spoke, her deep chestnut eyes glued to the eggshell-white tile flooring of Hanna's kitchen.

"I don't think it's safe."

Aria piped in, "Remember last time? We can't involve another therapist in this. I know Hanna is struggling but there's got to be a different way to help her."

"We're not helping her by just watching her. And A... A isn't waiting for Hanna to get better. "

Spencer kept speaking as to block out thoughts of what A could do.

"And... I think that she's getting worse if anything. Look, last night, she told me something scary. She-"

Aria and Emily interrupted in unison: "What?"

"She wants to kill herself."

A hollowed gasp slid out Emily's hanging jaw and her eyes trailed upward to match Spencer's stare.

"She..."

Aria's voice faded, her tone tinged with misplaced guilt.

"She needs a therapist. She needs it. I know it's dangerous, but-"

"Just stop there! It's dangerous. We can't," Emily rasped. "There's got to be another way."

"Like what? Tell her mom?" Spencer begged. The three exchanged knowing glances. Telling Ashley Marin anything in regards to Hanna was one thing Hanna had made her friends promise not to do. She'd told them, early on in her suffering but masked as always by shining daylight, "Look, I know I'm not in a 'good place' or... whatever... but you can't even call her, okay? She's working really hard. Promise me you won't talk to her. I'll talk to her soon. Promise me."

They'd promised.

"Maybe if we all talk to her?" Emily suggested then.

"All at once?" countered Aria, "Don't you think that's coming across a bit intervention-y?"

"She knows she needs help," Emily said, "She just won't admit it."

"We should do that. Maybe talking to her will help us decide what to do next," Spencer said quickly, solution attempts whirling through her head. She glanced at Aria, whose piercing hazel-green eyes were glancing upward. "Poor Hanna," she whispered.

"We can help her," Spencer said. She took her phone from her pocket and dialed Caleb's number. When he answered: "We need you guys back here."

Within an hour, they were back. Hanna's daytime demeanor was as it had been since Mona's demise- more mellow than usual; messier than usual. Functioning painfully.

"You needed something?" Caleb asked as he and Hanna followed Spencer into the living room, the couches turned toward each other with Emily and Aria settled on the farther.

"We gotta talk," Aria said. Spencer could tell she was avoiding looking toward Hanna. Caleb led Hanna to the empty couch and Spencer followed, stationing herself on Hanna's right.

"Hanna, Spencer told us what happened last night," Emily said gently. Hanna looked up from the nothing she'd previously been looking at to focus on Spencer. "Why'd you tell?" she asked. Her voice was weak.

"Han, she had to," deflected Aria, "You want to kill yourself... it's... it's really serious." Spencer looked to Caleb. His arm was around Hanna but he looked away, surprise flickering in his own dark eyes which refused to see his girlfriend. Hanna's brows were furrowed and she was shaking now.

"We all care a lot about you," started Emily, "We want to do what's best for you."

"Please get off me," Hanna squeaked. Caleb turned to look at her, bewilderment matching Spencer's own. Hanna repeated the request. Caleb retracted his arm and stood from the couch.

"Hanna?" whispered Emily. Hanna shook feverishly, her breathing choppy and loud. She fell into Spencer, the first burst of her sobs emerging. Spencer held her and looked up at Caleb in confusion.

"I think... Caleb, you can't understand," Emily said from her couch. "Hanna's been through a lot, and so have all of we, and..."

"It's all cuz of A," Spencer said, stroking Hanna's head and back and she wept.

"Hanna," Caleb said weakly.

"Maybe it's best you come back later. We'll, uh... keep you updated," Aria said.

"She-" Spencer stopped herself. She was unsure of how to explain it to Caleb. Hanna and Spencer and Emily and Aria were close beyond breakage because of A. But Hanna surely loved Caleb. She wondered how in Hanna's worst moments Hanna needed her more than Caleb. Caleb left without words. Spencer thought about the time they discovered Mona was A. They'd been close. Maybe Hanna had finally given up on trusting outside sources.

"I'm calling a therapist," Aria said finally. Hanna had quieted and she now laid with her head in Spencer's lap, her gaze looking out at nothing; her eyes were still glassy and pained. Aria left the room and Emily suggested making something for them to eat. Spencer looked down at Hanna. She hadn't moved, still looking out and away. A solitary teardrop fell onto Spencer's knee. Hanna sniffled, her lip quivering. Spencer could that even now she was holding back. Spencer held her as if she knew no other way to comfort her friend. Suddenly, Spencer's phone buzzed. She took it out of her pocket and read the message.

_Tell Hanna I say hello and Caleb does too!_

_I know Hanna's not herself right now, but maybe she'd snap back into it if she knew her beloved was under my care. I wonder how she'd feel if she knew she's the one who sent him away and right into my trap. Don't worry, he's not hurt yet. He's not ever very far away. Stop by the forest and see for yourself! _

Spencer could feel herself glaring at the message. It was long for an A message. She kept reading.

_Now, here's the catch. In exchange for Caleb, I'm gonna need to see three of four girls. You know the girls I'm talking about._

_Good luck! _

_-A_

"Damn it," Spencer heard herself say aloud.

"I just got the message too," quipped Aria as she entered the room shortly before Emily returned with a plate of sandwiches. Spencer looked from Emily to Aria.

"So it should be us three," she murmured, "but-"

"What are you talking about?" Hanna questioned then, sitting up, her eyes still bloodshot and her face red and tear-stained. "What did A say?"

Spencer thought quickly, as she often did, and responded, "A says they have a way to help get me out of going to jail."

Just this mention of this made Spencer flinch. She hated thinking about the jail situation, yet found herself doing so more often each day.

"That's good," Hanna replied, her voice rising lightly. Spencer smiled at her. Hanna was always incredibly thoughtful of others, even when in the stuck-sad mental state that she was. Spencer wondered how guilty Hanna must feel for all of her friends having to watch her as they did.

"But there isn't any reason for us... all... to go... so-"

Spencer was interrupted by Aria: "Han, I know you don't wanna do this but you're going to go talk to somebody. I just set it up and we can go now."

"Right!" Spencer agreed, "While you're there, we'll go get... whatever A has. This is probably just another one of their games anyway. It's worth it to check, though."

"All of you? So I'll be talking with the... person... alone?"

Spencer looked to Emily. Emily was the best at responding to that sort of thing, but this time, Emily was glancing back at Spencer.

"One of us will wait for you right outside the office," Aria lied. Spencer cringed, but Hanna seemed to accept the answer. They had soon made it to the psychologist's building. The psychologist was a skinny woman with dark eyes, black hair and tan, freckled skin. Aria had somehow managed to get the first visit free of charge.

"It's nice to meet you Hanna," she said warmly. "My name is Sylvia. We can head back now."

Hanna followed Sylvia down the hallway. Once out of earshot, Spencer leaned to Emily and Aria.

"How do we know this isn't a trap?" she asked.

"I called Caleb," Aria replied, "and A answered. I could tell from the over-dramatic breathing."

"So we really all have to go," Emily sighed. "I don't feel right about leaving her here."

"We don't have another option," Aria said. The trio finally agreed and left the office. Spencer sped the whole drive to the forest and when they got there, each yielding knives brought from the Marin kitchen, they screamed out for Caleb. In return came his voice: "Help!"

"This way!" exclaimed Emily as she dashed deeper into the woods. Spencer followed quickly with Aria toward where the call had come from. Then, they saw Caleb. He was tied up to a thick dying tree but unharmed.

"Where's Hanna?" exclaimed Caleb to Spencer's bewilderment. Emily was already working on sawing off the ties holding Caleb together.

"She's fine, she's talking to a therapist," Aria said, bending down to help Emily. Spencer surveyed the area. Caleb's focus shifted downward. He was thinking.

"How long have you been here, Caleb?" Spencer asked, her eyes still scanning across the forest.

"A knows," Caleb said suddenly.

"What?"

"A knows Hanna's at the therapist."

"How do you know?!" exclaimed Emily as the ropes holding down Caleb snapped beneath the knives. Caleb stood up.

"A caught me at gunpoint. They had me wait a moment. We heard Aria talking about the therapist. A left right after they tied me up! This was all a trap!"

Spencer was already running back toward the car, yelling for her friends to follow.

"We need to get back there!" she yelled feverishly. Everyone piled into the car and they sped off, Spencer possibly driving even faster than she had the way there. They arrived back at the parking lot of the office to see police cars and an ambulance.

"No," Spencer cooed. She ran to the police officer with her friends. "What happened?" she begged. The officer replied coldly, "You're awfully nosy."

"My friend was in there!" Spencer hissed. The cop glanced at his coworkers before looking back at Spencer.

"The ambulance doesn't need to be here because nobody on-site is hurt," he started, "but... a girl has been kidnapped. Witnesses say a hooded figure held them at gunpoint and just took her and left."

Spencer knew it was Hanna.

"What does the girl look like?" Emily rasped.

"Blonde hair, blue eyes, medium build. She's a new patient of her's-"

The officer pointed to Sylvia.

Spencer's phone buzzed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey all! Emi here. I just wanted to give you a heads up now that if you are a fan of Haleb, by the end of this fanfiction series, your dreams may be crushed, so it might be a good idea to escape while you can... I'm not a Haleb hater, I promise! I just prefer ideas of other pairings so if anything happens throughout this series, it will probably not be Haleb. If you're not a huge Haleb person, or if you are but are also fine with opposition toward your ship, then by all means, read on! CHAPTER THREE STARTS NOWWW**

_Come on, girls! I say bring three out of four and you don't expect something could happen to the one left alone? Pity it had to be Hanna. Even I'm starting to feel bad._

_-A_

Spencer looked up from her phone and to her friends, horrified. Emily and Aria mirrored the notion with an understanding derived from receiving the same text as Spencer.

"What do we do?" Caleb begged, his deep brown gaze darting from Spencer to Aria to Emily. Spencer thought for a moment.

"They couldn't have gotten far. Wait, Caleb, doesn't Hanna have her phone with her?"

Caleb's eyes widened. "You gave it back to her this morning?" he begged Spencer. Spencer nodded quickly, hope jumping up into her brain. She glanced at Emily to see her friend already dialing. Spencer's gaze buzzed around across the crime scene. The police would be looking for Hanna too. This would be good. Her stare focused in on Sylvia. "Be right back," Spencer started, walking toward Hanna's would-be therapist. "I'll come with you," Aria said from behind. They approached Sylvia, who looked at them through pitying eyes. Spencer hated that.

"I'm so sorry this has happened," Sylvia said to the girls. "It... it all happened so fast. I didn't know what to do. I wish there was something I could have done, but the gun was at her head, and had I moved..."

Sylvia trailed off, making room for Spencer to bring in her interrogation.

"What exactly happened?"

Sylvia glanced past the girls, then spoke. "I had barely introduced myself to Hanna when the lights went out. A figure in all black entered the room. I couldn't make out their face- it was shaded in a hood and again, the power was out, but we could see they had a gun. At first, it was aimed at me, but Hanna... she jumped at the figure. I don't know how why didn't turn to shoot her, but they didn't. I don't have any enemies- I don't know why someone would be aiming for me specifically. But Hanna struggled, and so the person... I keep stopping myself from saying man. It... did seem like a man. But... the person knocked her out with the back of the gun. They dragged her out.

Spencer swallowed and clasped her hands together.

"So-"

She was interrupted by Emily and Caleb, who'd approached from behind during Sylvia's story.

"We gotta go," Caleb said. Spencer spun to face them, bewildered.

"I'm not done here yet," Spencer said, "Did anybody answer Hanna's phone?"

"No." Emily.

"Looks like the cops are done here," Aria quipped, pointing to patrol cars turning out of the lot.

"We need to find where they're headed," Emily said, and Spencer agreed. The group made their way back to the car and sped after the cops.

"They could just be heading back to the police station," Aria mumbled as they drove. Spencer ignored her. Finally, they reached the destination of the cops- it was not the station. It was Spencer's family's lake house.

"Of course," Spencer choked, "Of course it's here. Where else would it be? Somewhere that doesn't incriminate me more than before?!"

They had stopped a few miles behind the cops in order to look less than suspicious. Nearly as soon as they unloaded the car, an ambulance had sped past them.

"What is going on?!" Spencer heaved. Her question was met with silence from the others. Spencer looked at her friends to see each facing the same direction; their faces blank. Spencer turned to see what they were watching. She gasped as police officers rushed into the water, then out of the water with a slumped body. Two other workers jumped out the back of the ambulance as they opened it with a stretcher. Spencer dashed toward the commotion. _Please no_, her brain begged. A police officer stopped Spencer before she could reach close enough to see, but Spencer watched as Emily pushed through to the stretcher. She watched Emily collapse in disdain as emergency workers pushed past her.

"Please, that's my friend!" Spencer begged, but the officer remained looking forward.

"Hanna!" Caleb echoed from behind Spencer, panicking. Soon, Emily was brought back to the others. She was breathing heavily.

"She's alive... barely," she whispered. A sigh of punctured relief flowed through the group as they watched their friend lay seemingly motionless on the stretcher as she was brought into the ambulance. Spencer felt sick as the memory of Hanna's broken body being lifted into an ambulance after a certain A hit her with a car only years ago entered her head. Anger and sadness mixed through her bloodstream. Hanna would never be well again if A didn't stop this shit.

They made their way to the hospital. After what seemed like days of waiting-room waiting, a kind-looking man with dark brown eyes and white-blond hair approached the group.

"She's stable," he said gently, "At this moment, she _is_ asking for Spencer."

He looked at Caleb.

"Oh, I'm not..."

Caleb's voice trailed. Spencer vocalized that she was Spencer and followed the man back to the room. Spencer entered, suppressing the daunting question of why Hanna had wanted her to come rather than Caleb or Aria or Emily.

"Hey, Han," she whispered, sitting in the chair beside the bed. Hanna shifted slightly to look at her. Spencer avoided looking at the windpipe going into Hanna's neck. She reached out and took Hanna's hand.

"I can't believe this happened," Spencer started, "We won't leave you again. A has reached a new low."

"It wasn't all A," Hanna whispered, flinching as she did for reasons beyond Spencer's understanding.

"What do you mean?" Spencer asked. Before Hanna answered, the door was opening again. Aria, Emily, and Caleb stood at the doorway.

"Are we allowed in?" Caleb questioned, his voice feigning a joking tone. Spencer sighed. She wondered if Caleb realized that despite the fact that Hanna had a good sense of humor, now was not the time to be kidding.

"You're not," Hanna replied quietly.

"What?"

"I'm sorry," Hanna said. Spencer watched Hanna look down at their joined hands.

"I don't know what's going on Hanna. I hope you're okay." Caleb left.

"You guys can come in," Hanna mumbled to the remaining doorway-standers.

"I hope you're not in too much pain," Emily said to Hanna, finding a seat at the end of the bed.

"Me too," Aria agreed, "But we... the cops are going to be asking you a lot of questions soon. We need tell a story."

"The story is, A- as in Ali- tried to drown Hanna. That's it. That's the story," Spencer snapped.

"That's not the story," Hanna uttered, fiddling with the ends of her sleeve. Spencer noticed she was matching Hanna's breathing- heavily; slowly.

"You can tell us, and we can fix it for the police," said Spencer.

"You're going to hate me."

Spencer cocked her head. "We won't," she said.

"Whatever happened, you can tell us. We're your best friends."

Hanna glanced at Emily. She then focused back to the hands, and started.

"A knocked me out with a gun and took me to the cabin. I woke up on a little boat- one like the one I was on with Lucas before I fell out and swam back to shore."

Spencer remembered how scared Hanna had been that night.

"There was a weight tied to my ankle. Near me, there was a message from a in a bottle. It was some comment about me and dead weight. You know, A. I sat up, and thought for a moment, and then I jumped into the water. I knew the weight was on me. I knew I wouldn't be able to swim with it. I... I was trying to..."

She trailed off.

"Anyway, I could feel myself drowning when I felt someone pulling me back up- the weight was hooked off my ankle. I think I lost consciousness on the way up, though. But... the only thing I can think is that A saved me. A didn't want me to die so they must've called the police here."

Spencer's breathing had sped up. She couldn't believe all she'd just heard. A didn't want Hanna to die. A wanted to play games, like usual. But Hanna didn't. She'd outplayed A. A didn't want Hanna to die. Just Hanna did.


	4. Chapter 4

**editor note or whatever.. emi again! omg you guests are ruthless! just gonna say this right off the bat: if you wanted me to write about haleb, sadly(for you i guess) that isn't what i like writing about. this is my first fanfiction and honestly and ultimately, what i have written and what i will continue to write is for me! this is what i enjoy writing about! i'm more than happy if it's what you enjoy reading about because i love feedback, but if it's not, i'm not going to alter how i write it in any way way just to appease people who prefer something i don't prefer. i don't write these for haleb fans. i write these for me. i publish them for anybody who likes what i write. i wasn't gonna write chapter 4 today but now i'm going to. there will be literally no caleb. this will probably be a pretty short chapter. story BEGINS NOWW**

"Hanna, you can't tell that to the cops," Aria pressed. Her tone was weak and singed with fret.

"We need to think fast," Spencer said, standing from her chair. She began pacing as Hanna said, "I'll just say I was attacked."

Hanna sounded more defeated than ever but Spencer had to keep her focus. Emily had take Spencer's chair and was holding Hanna's hand.

"How are you feeling?" she asked. Spencer stopped as she realized how selfish she and Aria were being.

"Fine," Hanna replied. While Hanna, like the rest of the girls, was an impeccable liar, Spencer knew that there was no way that Hanna was simply, truly fine.

"When do you think you'll get out of here?" Aria asked softly. Hanna looked at the ceiling. "I dunno," she replied.

"We'll stay with you the whole time," Emily soothed. "We'll take shifts, probably. But there will always be someone here."

"Like always," Hanna said coarsely. Spencer moved back to her friend on the opposite side of the bed from where she'd been previously. She rubbed Hanna's shoulder as she spoke. "We'll say you were attacked and you think it was a girl. That way Ali will-"

"I don't think it was a girl," Hanna said gently. Spencer gulped.

"You were attacked by someone whose gender you couldn't determine. You were left on the boat. You tried to row back, but you slipped out. You were so tired from swimming back that you simply weren't able to anymore, and that's how you sunk."

Hanna closed her eyes.

"I'll start," Spencer told Aria and Emily. They nodded in understanding.

"We'll be back if you ever need us," Aria said, partially to Spencer and partially to Hanna. The pair left. Spencer reclaimed her seat and began brushing through Hanna's hair. It was rough from the lake water that'd seeped into it and still slightly damp. Spencer then realized Hanna was still in her normal clothes; the ones she'd sunk into a lake in.

"Are your clothes still wet?" Spencer asked, realizing she hadn't even noticed before. She touched Hanna's shirt sleeve, which was slightly damp.

"Shouldn't they give you something dry to wear?"

Hanna's eyes had remained closed until now, as she looked at Spencer.

"They did. It's just a hospital gown; it's over on the counter. They said I'd change later."

"You could probably just change now," countered Spencer as she stood again and moved to the counter. She turned back to face Hanna, the two picking up on Spencer's innate worry toward Hanna simultaneously.

"Well, I..." Hanna trailed off, her reddened cheeks betraying embarrassment. Spencer surveyed the feeble answer, then Hanna. She was hooked up all over. She wouldn't be able to change herself. Spencer quickly put down the gown and moved back to Hanna, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You've got plenty of time to change, I guess," she quipped, "Maybe you like your clothes wet. I'm not one to judge."

Normally, Hanna might've laughed, or at least acknowledged Spencer's satirical attempts. But Spencer understood why Hanna's response was simply to shut her eyes once more and breathe loudly.

"I'm sorry you're so sad, Han."

Hanna spoke with her back turned and her eyes shut: "I'm more sorry. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you. All of you. Caleb... I don't think... I don't think that I love him anymore."

Spencer gulped. "Why do you say that?"

"Ever since Mona died... it's been hard to trust. But that's not it. It's hard to love... almost anybody. It's hard to love somebody you don't know will be there forever."

Spencer understood. She and Toby had had their own arguments just as Hanna and Caleb had.

"But... it's different with you."

Spencer felt her eyes widening.

"You and Aria and Emily."

Spencer let free a breath. For a moment, she wondered if Hanna was going to say she loved her... sure, Spencer had thought about that scenario once or twice in the past. Maybe more times. Probably more times. But she'd tried so, so hard to repress it all. To cease thinking about things that would simply never occur. Spencer and Hanna... that could never happen.

"But especially you."

_What?_

"Spence, I guess I really have nothing to lose at this point."

Spencer's heartbeat quickened. She froze in her stance.

"I'm sorry if this is hard on you- you're with Toby, I know, I know..."

A pause.

"But I think I've fallen in love with you."

Spencer felt warm tears seeping out her eyes.

"Hanna, I know things have been so hard on you lately..."

_Fuck it._

"I've fallen in love with you, too."


	5. Chapter 5

Spencer's eyes shot open to sharp beeping noises and bright red lights. She sat up, remembering she'd fallen asleep wrapped around Hanna. She gulped as she looked around from nurse to nurse.

"Uh, sorry to disturb you," a nurse with red hair muttered. She glanced at the other; a man with piercing brown eyes that almost bordered on maroon.

"It's... fine," Spencer said, jumping off the bed. She looked to Hanna, who was still asleep. The windpipe had been removed from around her neck. "Is Hanna okay?"

"Yes, don't worry," assured the girl-nurse, "she's perfectly fine! We're actually setting her up to leave. You are..."

Spencer finished quickly, "Her good friend."

"Right. Well, someone should keep an eye on her for the next couple days, just to make sure she's doing all right. Can you do that?"

"Of course," Spencer said. She checked her watch. Six in the morning- too early for Emily or Aria to have visited... though if they had, Spencer could easily brush off the sleeping incident- friends sleep together. Sometimes closely as they did.

"She'll be waking up any time," the nurse with brown eyes said. He turned to leave. As the two exited, the red-haired nurse added, "The doctor should be in any minute."

Spencer nodded. She watched as the nurses nearly bumped into someone, who revealed herself as Emily as she entered the door.

"You're here early," Spencer commented.

"Yeah, I was worried," Emily countered, "have you checked your phone at all since yesterday?"

"Not since yesterday night," Spencer said. She went to her phone to scroll through a small army of Emily text messages.

"Sorry."

"You need to be more careful, Spence. We gotta protect Hanna right now."

Spencer didn't know how to reply. Before her lack of response became too noticeable, however, the doctor entered.

"Still not awake?" he asked, then faced Spencer. With a grin, he chuckled, "sleep well? We didn't want to wake you two."

Spencer avoided looking at Emily. She said, "Oh? Isn't that against procedure?"

The doctor's smile faded. "Let's get down to business."

Spencer turned as she heard Hanna beginning to stir.

"Ow," she whispered, squinting upward.

"Uh, maybe one of you could stay with your friend while the other handles the details with me in the hall?"

"I'll go with you," Emily said, and Spencer finally caught enough nerve to look toward her. Emily followed the doctor out the door, looking back at Spencer curiously, half-smirking, before she left. Spencer's eyes widened and she turned back to Hanna.

"Hey, Han, how're you feeling?"

"Fine," Hanna replied, sitting up as a genuine smile crept its way out of hiding and across Hanna's lips. Spencer felt emotion well up at her lungs. She went to Hanna and the girls embraced. Spencer rubbed Hanna's back and said that she missed her smile.

"I can't believe you've had feelings for me all this time," Hanna rasped. "I didn't think... you hid it so well. I guess I did too."

"I tried really hard to hide it," admitted Spencer.

"What about Em and Aria?"

"Emily... we can literally tell her... right now, if you want. I'm pretty sure she already knows something's up."

Hanna took Spencer's hands in her own.

"If that's what you want," Hanna said. Spencer could feel tinges of Hanna returning. It would take a lot more for Hanna to get back to her usual self, but Spencer was glad to see the tinges.

"I guess it is. It's better not to keep secrets from them when we don't have to."

"And Toby?"

Spencer shook her head. "Don't worry about Toby," she said, "that's my problem. I think... I think he's realized something's been up for awhile now."

"I hope he doesn't hate me for it."

"He won't, Han. We were in love once... but I'm not now. I've got to tell him as soon as possible, though... that's what's best for him, and me, and you."

Emily returned to the room and told the two what was going on with Hanna- the bill was outrageous. Spencer would have to beg her parents about it, so Hanna wouldn't be bothering her mom about it- at least, that's how Hanna put it- "bothering." Spencer didn't expect Ashley Marin to truly be bothered by Hanna's medical issues, but she simultaneously understood Hanna's want for her to simply not know. After Emily finished explaining the expenses, she said how they'd need to go to the police station and talk about what had happened at the lake house as soon as Hanna was feeling good enough to. She quickly gave up pretending to care about the police- all four girls were completely over the cops at this point- when Spencer told her, via an interruption, that she and Hanna were in love on the car ride home.

"Well!" Emily exclaimed, her tone shifting between surprise and delight.

"You're happy about it!" Spencer said, matching Emily's delighted-half.

"I mean... yeah, well, yeah, I guess I am. So Aria's the only straight one?"

The girls laughed then, even Hanna, raising Spencer's happiness even further. They called Aria shortly before arriving at her home.

"Can I be the one to tell her?" Emily begged.

"It's like Christmas all over again with you," Hanna murmured through a gentle smirk. Spencer laughed louder than the volume of how funny she found Hanna's quip- Hanna was being herself again, and that was something to encourage greatly.

"Sure, you tell her," Spencer said. Aria opened the door and let them into her home, and Spencer thought to herself about how lucky she was to have people like Aria and Emily, who she felt no fear to tell that she was completely bisexual and in love with one of her other best friends. She tried to avoid the could-be crippling thoughts of the call she'd have to make to Toby sooner or later. The call would never be coming to her parents- at least that's what she wanted to tell herself. She didn't trust them; she just didn't want them to know ever.

"You seem like you're doing fine, Han," Aria quipped, "I'm glad."

Hanna smiled at her hands. Spencer hoped that Aria and Emily weren't expecting Hanna to be like this always from now on- Spencer certainly wasn't. Just because Hanna was good right now did not mean that if she was bad later, something was more wrong than it was right now. Spencer snapped out of her intruding thoughts when Emily announced the news to Aria.

"What?!" Aria screeched, "That's... I'm so happy for you?!"

"That's a question?" Spencer replied with a grin.

"This is just really unexpected! Like... you guys hid it well, I guess. Really well! Congratulations! Uh."

Emily was giddy. "That's what I said," she laughed.

"Have you... told Toby? Or Caleb?" Aria asked then. Before an answer, as if on cue, suddenly, both Spencer and Hanna's phones buzzed. Spencer glanced wide-eyed toward Hanna, who was already opening her text. Spencer looked back to her own cellphone and did the same, and the two read the letters aloud in unison:

_"I didn't expect Spanna!_

_It's okay. I'm prepared for anything."_

Attached, at the bottom of the phone, an image: a photograph taken of the night before by an unnoticed stranger who would have come at night while the girls cuddled together on a bed in a way more than friendly. The photograph was from slightly above, as if someone had stood on a chair to get a full-portrait. Despite the darkness, the faces were clear enough for anyone to know they were Hanna and Spencer.


End file.
